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Our military's esteemed leader,
General Tazen Ribrax... |
...and our great empire's First Citizen,
High Consul Comato Squarck. |
Thank you, thank you!
But, really, today isn't about me. It's about the men, women, and xamen on the ground, the real heroes--! |
Save your bloviating, Squarck.
We all have important work we could be doing.
This is a military installation, not one of your parades. |
Khahahaha, she knows me too well!
Let's cut to the chase, then:
In recognition of outstanding bravery in the field, and for striking our first ever victory against the terrible Cliff Mason... |
| ...I'm proud to award this Medal of Imperial Service to one Doctor Sunny Blaise! |
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| * Always knew I deserved this. |
Who woulda thought, all that military might and in the end it's one a' the eggheads who gets one over on Mason?
In an election year, too! Lu~cky! |
She's driven him back for now.
Still.
Countless aves have promised more and delivered less.
Tell me, doctor... how did you do it? |
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* Aw, y'know. I just laid down some sick burns on him and he fucked off right home.
* Easy as. |
A vulnerability to fire...
Damn it. I should have known. |
Aww, and look, Ribbsy!
She's a bald girl, just like you! It's like I'm seein' double! |
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| * General, just to check, it's not illegal or anything if I call this woman a dickwipe? |
| You're a citizen of the empire, doctor. It's your duty to speak freely. |
| Ahahaaa! You wound me, Ribbsy, truly! |
| Cha-ahahaha! Hit me with the old double tap, why don't you!! |
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* Aaaanyway, not that I'm not baskin' in all the well-earned appreciation I'm finally seein' round here, but I really oughta get back to my research.
* Yanno, for the empire. |
Great idea, doc! You can show us around the facilities!
Doctor Kree'zik's always telling me how this place is on the cutting edge of Avean science, and I would love to see what xey're on about. |
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* Fuckin'... of course.
* Righto, kids. All aboard the Sunny Express. |
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* Now, I'm not all that acquainted with most of this facility because I'm not a nosy bitch and I stay in my lane.
* So you lot are only getting the partial tour here. |
Good. Division of responsibility is key to what operational efficiency our empire has left.
What's your field? |
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* Bio. Or, xenobio.
* Same shit really, but an extra X in a job title really makes a resume pop.
* Take yourselves a gander: |
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* We got all sorts of shit in here.
* Bunch of angels. Some kind of worm thing. Weird cunt with like a billion wings.
* Stop me if I'm getting too technical here. |
| Is that a pair of humans I see? Ohohoho, the conservationists are gonna love this! |
| No hard feelings about the whole "exploded planet" thing, hey? |
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| Save your breath, creature. I'm not in the habit of making conversation with my captors. |
Hey, c'mon, I wasn't even in power when that happened! Other guy did it.
Would not have happened on my watch! |
Easy to claim, Squarck.
He was a smarter ave than you. |
| Clearly not, since I would never botch an invasion so bad we had to blow the whole planet! |
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...
| Don't know what you're on about |
| This is just vibes but I think you totally would have botched that invasion |
| → | No hard feelings about that but I do have some thoughts about the imprisonment |
| Is this still in Hellfuck...? You're weirdly talkative for an angel |
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| AhahehaHAA!!! Get a load a' this guy, I like this one! |
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| Hold on. What invasion was this? |
Wait. Do they not know?
Oh Helix, this is awkward! Ahahahaa!!
Just like me to walk into a gaffe like that! |
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* Awright, show's over.
* You're gonna fuck with my specimens if you keep gabbin' on like that. |
Awww, you're no fun.
You're like Ribbsy! All work and no play!
No wonder you get along so well, ahaha!! |
I'll keep an eye on how this research progresses, doctor.
Don't let us down. |
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* Aw yeah mate, it's been fan-fuckin-tastic.
* Seeya, bye, toodles, et cetera et cetera. Get outta here. |
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* RIGHTO!
* So here's the plan--! |
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